Surfing Saga VII: Surfer Girl Rides Again

  Surfer Girl Rides Again

  We pack up the truck and head west, yes to the spot, to the same location, to the very same place that almost took my life.  O.K. maybe not almost took my life, but still…I know it is time, but I wonder if I could come up with any more excuses to push it back just one more day.  I’m a tad crabby to say the least.  I know it is for the best.  The only way to show Mother Nature that she did not get the best of me, that she did not win, that yes, She would see me once again.

As we start to edge around the corner, towards the west side, I am hoping that maybe it is flat.  You know, so flat there is no point cuz all you’ll do is paddle, and paddle some more, with no waves to catch.  I am rewarded, it is flat, or at least at the southern most end of the west side.  As we approach the next turn in the road, I’m looking over, searching, to see what is out there, if I can escape today’s change encounter with Mother Nature.  I see a few waves, but they are small, really too small.  I’m relaxing while being completely and totally stressed-out, all at the same time.  I think good, it is still flat, no waves.  We keep traveling further and further towards the dreaded monster.  As we pull adjacent to the edge, there are waves, but I wonder, hum, can I say they are too small?  Awe, there is no parking, oh darn, can’t park, can’t surf.  But no, Skeeter would have to find the one spot along the highway that he could squeeze the big monster truck into.  Engine off, open door, hop out (literally, because I cannot reach the ground from inside the truck), shut the door, saunter to the edge.  Wow, the edge is sandy, not rocky, that’s a good sign.  The water looks peaceful, calm, inviting.  Should I, maybe not, well it does seem like a good day, after all I drove all this way, better to give it a go, especially on a day like today.  O.K. there is no more excuses, no more waiting, no more reason to not go. 

Drudge my beaten-down body back to the truck, open the door, untie the board, pull down the board (O.K. actually Skeeter pulled down the board, yeah, that’s right, because I cannot reach even if I stand on the running board!), carry it across the parking lot, to the edge, over the cliff, and lie it on the boulders.  Take it out of the case.  It looks so innocent, so sweet and full of life, as if it can do no more harm to you than a sweet little baby.  It’s calling to me, asking me where I’ve been and why it’s been locked away for so long.  Gosh I hope the wax is OK, it looks a little ratty.  It will be fine, I’m sure it will be fine.  Sunscreen, scalp spray, lip balm, shirt off, shorts off, shoes off, ankle strap on.  Now there is nothing more to do to waste time, I mean to prepare.  I turn and look to my beloved Skeeter, my coach, my strength, my enlightenment, my wisdom, my…and he interrupts my thoughts with “well, get to it.”  No special words of wisdom, no positive encouragement, nothing, absolutely nothing.  I guess this will all ride on me.

Eewwee, the wax feels kind of yucky.  I’m sure it will be fine.  I’ll just flip the board over and cool it down.  I’m sure it will be fine.  Wax doesn’t go bad, does it?  I look over the horizon, watching and timing my departure just right.  There is really nothing to watch or time since, remember, it is flat!  I push the board out, and hop on.  I start to paddle…not too bad, this feels familiar, like riding a bicycle, one never forgets.  I paddle and look, paddle and look, finding my spot amongst the few surfers trying to catch a wave on this blissfully delightful day.  I can do this.  This isn’t that bad.  Keep paddling, get to the spot, well maybe stay in kind of close for the first few.  You know, ride the white water a few times, maybe even just fly in on my stomach or knees, just to get a feel for it again.  Yikes, here comes a wave, what do I do, what do I do, I can’t remember what to do, oh yeah, push up.  Like duh, that wasn’t that big of a deal.  Just relax, it is like every other time, no big deal, just catch a few waves, just a few. 

I find my spot and swing my body upright, sitting on the board.  It is rather nice out today, a little cloudy, but still warm enough not to freeze to death.  The water is absolutely beautiful, I can see all the way to the bottom.  Maybe I don’t really want to see all the way to the bottom?  I glance around and see a young boy pointing down and trying to get his father’s and brother’s attention.  He is insistent that they look at what he is pointing at.  It can’t be a shark, could it?  In this spot?  We’re in pretty close still.  But what about all those shark attacks we keep hearing about?  It could be a shark, couldn’t it?  IIIIIIII what is that shadow?  Oh snap, it is a shark, I know it is, what’s moving under there, oh my gosh, what should I do, what did they say to do again, don’t lie flat, stand vertical so they won’t think your food, oh my gosh, why did I think I wanted to be a surfer girl anyway, the headlines are going to read surfer girl dies from shark attack after devastating crash in the same place…how stupid is this surfer girl to return to the same place?!  Oh, it was just a shadow from the passing plane.  Boy, I need to relax before I give myself a heart attack, but really, maybe I’d rather like the water a little more murky after all. 

Sitting on my board, I watch the horizon, I seek out the best wave for the first catch of the day.  Here comes one, no it is just a swell, I’ll let this one pass.  The water is pretty calm, that’s kind of weird.  Another several waves come and go as I sit on my board and contemplate.  The longer I sit here, the harder it will be…just take the next one, who cares if it is a baby one, just take it.  Here it comes, paddle, paddle, paddle, no really paddle…do you even remember how to paddle?  The wave comes rolling through, catching my board and thrusting me forward, I am sailing full speed ahead, going so fast I might crash into the rock wall if I don’t take control of this board.  I push up, pop to my knees, grab the oh so thin rails, jump to my feet, stay squatting until I get my balance, it’s ok to squat, it is a form of surfing, and wham, slid right across the board, off the other side and splash, right into the shallow water.  That was a close one, don’t want to rip my gluteus on the coral today!  Jump back on the board, paddle, paddle, paddle…this is nice, the water is so smooth, so calm, so peaceful, it’s a joy to be just paddling across the waves.  It is a very serene feeling.  This isn’t too bad.  I don’t know why I was so freaked-out about coming back.  It’s as if nothing ever happened.  I’ll just catch the next wave and be right on top of my game!

Wishful thinking, at the very least.  The next several attempts are fruitless, with the same sliding off to the other side of the board, not finding balance, crashing, and then paddling and paddling and paddling back out to get in position just to repeat the same sequence over again.  What is it that we coaches are always telling our charges, to keep practicing, it will come?  Back into position.  Back to more falling off, not finding balance, crashing, and paddling.  This one looks a little bigger, but not out of control.  Quick, turn the board around, lie down, no scoot down further, OK that’s better, look over your shoulder, no the other one, remember, the left one, paddle. 

Really, paddle, paddle harder, paddle, paddle, paddle, here it comes…the wave whooshes in, stanches my board and pummels it towards the shore with me hanging on for dear life.  Instinct takes over, up to my knees, hold the rail, jump to your feet, hold the rail, hold the rail, find your balance, find your balance, am I balanced? 

I can’t tell, stand up, stand up, I said, STAND UP!!  Up I pop, flying a million miles an hour towards shore, but I’m standing, maybe a little wobbly, you know you gotta get your “surfer legs” back.  Wait, I’m pretty sure I don’t want to crash onto the shore.  How do I turn, I forgot how to turn.  How do I turn?!  No time to search my memory for recall.  Why didn’t it just instantly recall the information I needed.  Why I am debating this when I’m going to crash onto the shoreline, the rock wall, and well, we all know what would happen if that happened.  Stop thinking and do something, anything, just do something.  What did Beth say to do, jump off your board, no, that’s not it, fall in, no flop, flop, flop like a starfish.  Whew, that was a close one, with just a few feet from shore and my gluteus just skimmed the top of the coral reef.  Now, that wasn’t that bad, was it? 

I climb back onto my board, look over the horizon, seek out my spot, and paddle out, enjoying the serene, peaceful water.  Just me and my board.  Nothing and no one to distract me.  No whining children, no out-of-control students, no nagging spouse, no deadlines, no exams to study for, no nothing, no one but me and my board.  Just the two of us, finding that connection again.  Finding the oneness that it takes to truly be considered a surfer girl. 

This time, I need to get back in the groove and practice my turns, and stops.  That should be easy, I had them down pat before.  I get in position, me and my board, and paddle hard while the waves come rolling in.  I push up, pop to my knees, jump to my feet, ride the rails just for a moment, stand up, put pressure on the back foot, move arms, there we go, we’re turning.  See, it’s not that bad.  What a good day to come and get my feet wet again.  As I sit on my board, watching the horizon, contemplating life, I begin to realize that there hasn’t been a wave for some time now, well, that’s ok, just sitting out here is good.  Being able to get past my emotional scars, work through the trauma, is worth it.  What a good day to do this.  Ooppss, here comes and goes a set.  I really should pay better attention.  I am here to surf after all.  Pay attention, watch the horizon, read the waves.  What the heck, oh-my-gosh, that is thee biggest wave I have ever seen!  Crap, crap, crap…I better ride this one cuz I really don’t want to try to go through it, that’s for sure.  Turn the board, turn the board, TURN THE BOARD ALREADY!  Paddle, paddle, no really, paddle, look over your shoulder, maybe not that shoulder, look over the other shoulder it won’t look as huge.  This is way too big, what was I thinking, I’m going to crash and die, well maybe not die, but I might really get hurt this time…too late, here it comes…the wave comes pounding in, hard and fast.  Forget paddling, hang on, hang on!  Dang, this wave really sent me flying, I’m really moving now, like a freight train on a crash course with the train station.  Remember, the shore is right there, right there!  Push up, knees, feet, balance, ride the rails, stand up, pressure, pressure, turn, turn, turn.  Whew, this is pretty good.  This is pretty sweet.  This is the ride!  The one ride you wait for, the one you dream of.  Nothing to get too stressed about, nothing to get too worried about.  It’s all good.  Whoops, pay attention to what you’re doing otherwise you’ll…you’ll…you’ll crash…WHAM!  I hit the water hard, press my body out like a starfish, float up to the surface, look around, don’t want that board to have another one-on-one with my face.  Oh there it is, resting peacefully, floating next to me, waiting to be collected, to be ridden again, as if it is not a deadly weapon.  Don’t ever forget that!   

Mother Nature must be on vacation today, that wave really wasn’t that bad.  I’ve surfed bigger and faster.  Cool.  I’m up for a few more before calling it a day.  I hop onto my board and start paddling out…imagine, eyes growing ten times their size, pupils dilating until all that is left is black, breathing stopped, heart racing, if I could be sweating I would be, as I peer at the awesome set of waves Mother Nature has sent my way.  There is no way I can ride these, I’m too close to the shoreline and not in position, can’t get in position.  I have only one option, that is paddle into the wave and pray She doesn’t shallow me whole.  Here She comes, tall and mighty, with incredible force.  What are the options again, hold and roll, or push up and hang on.  Can’t hold and roll, that’s for sure.  I swear I need to stop being so analytical and just perform.  It’s gotta be push up and hang on.  The nose is tipping over the wave, straight up towards to sky, I’m hanging on tight, albeit the rest of me is flailing from side to side.  Splat!  The board slams down on the other side of the wave.  SPLAT!  goes my body as I slam onto the board, full force.  So, a little bruising won’t be that bad.  War wounds.  Evidence of my success.  If that is all Mother Nature has to throw at me today, I win.  Did I just say that?  Not good!  She is always, always listening.  She will never let you win.  She wants you to always remember who is in charge.  She wants to remind you that you are a guest in Her world, in Her water. 

She heard…She’s sending me a reminder…not just one huge, gigantic wave, but a set, a set of three…I’m not even on the board yet.  This is when it happened last time.  No time to get on, quick, grab the nose, grab the nose.  (As if that’s gonna make a difference-it didn’t last time!)  The wave is reeling closer and closer.  The curl is right there, almost on top of me, it’s gonna drop right on my head…ooohhhh, She gave me a break…as I see the white water rushing towards me.  What a relief.  YIKES, here comes the next one, bigger and stronger than the last.  As I scurry onto the board, it grows closer and closer…getting bigger and bigger…gaining momentum…gaining strength…getting ready to eat me in one big gulp.  I could wait it out, but, but, but it’s too late…paddle…one stroke, two strokes, it’s upon me, it’s roaring over me, I can barely hang on as She whips me around like a rag doll.  SPLAT!  goes the board.  SPLAT!  goes my body onto the board.  Whew, another close call.  Just one more, just one more.  Up and over, no worries here.  Paddle to your spot, paddle to your spot.

Pop up, move body, swing legs over, and sit, hanging legs, dangling legs, just chill, enjoy, find what it is you came here looking for…one more ride, just one more.  Be patient, wait, don’t be greedy.  It will come.  The perfect wave.  The perfect ride.  As long as you respect.  As long as you sustain patience.  As long as you are humble.  She will provide.  No, not this one.  This is not the one.  Wait, be patient.  Not this one either.  Wait.  She will send the perfect one.  Show respect, show respect.  Awe, She provides.  She provides the perfect one.  As I paddle effortlessly, cutting through the water as if it is whip cream, I glide over the top of the wave, there are no steps, I stand, I ride, I turn, I drop back down onto the board, and call it a day.

Although Mother Nature made her presence known, She allowed me to gain my strength, build my confidence, feel secure with Her again, She let me win, just this once, just so She knows I’ll come back for another visit.  Ah, Mother Nature, She is wondrous, She is glorious, She just is!