Surfing Saga VIII-Surfer Girl Rides with the Big Dogs!

Surfing Sage VIII:  Surfer Girl Rides with the Big Dogs Well folks, it has been a while since the last surfing saga, but alas, I finally have an experience to share.   Every year the Maui Junior Life Guard program has a celebration on the last day of the training, and they usually go to one of the “local” beaches.  For the last two years they have gone to Ho’okipa, the surfing capital of the world.  Last year I tried to convince the instructor to take me surfing while we were there, but to no avail.  I spent weeks trying to get her to take me out, but nothing.  This year was different.  She told me to bring my board because we were going out. I dutifully strapped my board on the top of my “monster truck,” OK, not really jus, Ariel had to help me lift it up on top since I can’t reach, sad, but true!!!  I packed my backpack and off we went.  I was trying to distract myself, to not think about it.  It had been a long time since the last ride, and that one was the first time since the accident.  I was a tad nervous, if you could imagine.  We arrived before everyone else, so we grabbed a spot and unloaded the board.  Every minute I was waiting and watching the water, was painfully twice as long as real life.  I watched as other surfers paddled out.  I watched as they rode the huge waves way, way out.  I watched them trying to get back in.  I watched the waves; how they rolled; how they crashed; where they went; what direction; how high; how much white water there was; and every other element you could think of about the water, waves, environment, and Mother Nature.  Ah, yes, Mother Nature.   As I waited, patiently, I noticed several women, well, young women, girls really.  All doing different things to prepare.  One just stood, holding the tip of her board, staring.  Maybe she was trying to get in the zone.  The second, kneeling down next to her board.  Concentrating so deeply on waxing her board.  She went over and over the same spots, like she couldn’t see what she was doing.  The third, a tall, beautiful blonde, standing at the top of the steps, talking, no listening to a man.  Oh, that’s her coach.  OH, THAT’S HER COACH.  She’s one of the ones on the pro circuit.  She’s at practice.  Life must be rough, getting paid to surf!  What is he saying to her?  They’ve been standing there forever.  I strain to hear…that’s when the instructor arrived, interrupting my eavesdropping.   She gave a brief presentation about responsibilities, safety, currents, and all that, then sent everyone out.  I hung back, not too sure this is really what I wanted to do.  She grabbed her board and tugged at me to get a move on.  It took me twice as long to get it together than usual.  I went through the whole ritual, you know, check hair, sunscreen, check bathing suit, take board out of bag, check the strap, check the wax, go back for scalp sunscreen, wear shoes down, don’t wear shoes down, wear shoes down, oh yeah, chapstick…nothing more to check, apply, change, add.  Nothing holding me back.  No choice, can’t not go, need to save face.  I’d only been begging her for a year to take me.  I grabbed my board and toddled across the path, down the stairs, and along the beach until finally reaching the entry point.  When I say entry point, it is not anywhere you feel like getting in the water, not at Ho’okipa.  There is one and only one entry point.  This small, maybe 5’ opening, across worn-down coral, that slimmed into a very small funnel, barely enough for one person to stand, let alone put a board in the water and jump on.  I hesitated, just for a moment, debating, when one of the junior lifeguard trainees asked if I was really going to go out there, with an inference in her voice like maybe I was too old, or too female, or too anything but a true surfer.  For some reason that lit a spark under me, I flipped the board over and flipped it over again, push it just a little bit out, and jumped on.  Off I went paddling away, as if I did this every day, at Ho’okipa. It was pretty cool at first, no big deal, I can paddle out.  Really, how hard can it be?  It’s just like anywhere else, right?  Now what did the instructor say again about the pattern?  Oh yeah, paddle along the edge of the cliff as close as you can.  Yeah right, next to the cliff, I’ll get a little closer, but I’m not getting that close, that’s for sure.  I reach the spot where the instructor is sitting on her board, giving directions and advice to the trainees.  I pull-up on my board, sit up, and hang for a few minutes.  Figured I better get my bearings and all.  Here comes a pretty big wave, I quickly lie down and paddle towards it, you know they way you are taught to paddle into a wave.  My heart is racing, I can feel my body shaking, I know I must look as white as a ghost.  Crap, crap, crap, is it going to crash on me…no, I went right over it, no big deal.  It really wasn’t that bad.  It is just my mind playing with me.  Whew, OK, I can do this.  The instructor told me to look for the flat, white rock, and use that as a guide.  That is the starting point, the point of reference.  That’s cool, I’m all-good, got it. She nudged me out and told me to catch the next one, but I was not exactly ready yet.  She grabbed it while I watched.  I turned around to check the waves, there was one coming so fast, and so big I had no time to make any decision what-so-ever.  It is either crash and burn or try and catch it.  Catching it sounded much better then the other option, so I got into position, looking over my shoulder, not that one, it is too scary, look over the other one, paddle…aaaaahhhhh!  The wave picks me up and flings me towards the shore as if to say She didn’t want me there, get out of the water, go home.  All I could do was hang on as tight as possible as I went screaming toward the sand.  I didn’t even try to standup, what was the point.  I can’t remember ever going that fast, ever.  These waves are strong and powerful and they will eat you up in seconds flat if you don’t take control.  That was good, I’m good, we can call it a day, right.  No, of course not, that would be way too easy.  Off I go, paddling along the cliff (not really that close though). I reached the flat, white rock, and was planning on sitting and resting, but Mother Nature had another idea in mind.  Huge wave after huge wave came crashing in; there was no time to sit on your board and rest.  It was either Her or me and She won last time, so there was no way I was going to let Her win this time.  As She pushes me deeper into the spot, I know I’m going to have just do it, just grab the wave and do what I know how to do.  As one from this set comes flashing in, I talk myself through the steps, paddle, paddle, paddle, push up, maybe not, hold on, hold on, hold on.  Dang, She is so fast, I can barely stay on my board.  Don’t let her win, make a move, do something.  Push-up, knees-wind pressing against my face so forcefully I can’t see, just let your body do its thing, don’t think.  Stand up already, stand up!  Up I go, down I go.  FEAR!  Flash backs.  I didn’t think one could have flashbacks from a surfing accident, I thought that was reserved for those who really went through…well, you know what I mean.  The image of the board flying in the air, in slow motion coming towards me, watching myself from outside of my body, doing nothing but watching as the board body-slams my face.  Grab the nose of the board, hold it tight, watch the set!  I quickly flip my board over and as I scramble on, the next wave comes, hitting me hard, and shoving me across the board.  Plop, on the other side…another wave coming, coming now, hurry, hurry.  I don’t think I have ever scrambled onto my board so fast ever.  Hold on, hold the rails, ride this one out.  Whew, made it through another one.  Look down, oops, something is not in the same place as when I put it on this morning.  Tug, pull, rearrange.  Better.   That wasn’t too bad.  Paddle back out, look for the flat, white rock.  The waves are “calm” today, or so I’ve been told, as I thrash through the choppy, knock your block off, “calm” waves to get back out.  Oh yeah, don’t forget, there is no resting, remember?  The instructor looks at me for a moment, then asks if I’m all right.  My reply was, not really.  I’m just a tad scared, you know after the accident and all.  Her response, you’ll be fine, just stay by the flat, white rock.  As if this flat, white rock has magical powers or something!  I lie on my board, watching, and praying not to die today.  All the trainees have taken their rides and I’m the only one left, by the flat, white rock.  Yeah, these trainees are what, 10, 11, 12 maybe, OK a few are 14 or 15, but still, how old am I and I’m still just sitting here.  I push my way out to the sweet spot.  Bring it on Mother Nature, bring-it-on. My eyes about to bug out of my head, as She brings it on.  No need to paddle, I learned that with the other waves.  She is all-powerful and Her waves can launch a rocket ship if She wanted.  It’s coming, it’s coming, I can’t look, I do not care what the “rules” are, I’m not looking.  My knuckles are turning white from holding on so tightly, I think I stopped breathing.  Is that my heart I can hear?  I feel Her under me.  I feel Her power lift me.  I feel Her strength as She flings me across Her.  Don’t think, just do it, don’t think, just do it.  Push-up, knees, whoa, way too fast, I’m going to eat it for sure, stand up, be tough, you can do it!  Up, up, I’m up, and across the board I go flying, and bam, I hit the water hard, really hard.  Good thing I remembered that starfish concept, cuz I just about sliced my hinny on the reef.  As I grabbed the nose, and looked around to get my bearings and see what She was up to.  One of the trainees asked if I was OK and if I was sure I wanted to go out again.  Now I realize she was just being kind and thoughtful, but really, what do I look like, an old, decrepit lady, really!  Hahaha, yeah I’m fine, it was nothing really, just didn’t have good balance-is what I said to her.  What I was thinking was a completely different matter-you can only imagine. It didn’t seem this far to paddle out last time.  My arms are aching, I feel like Jell-O.  I look like, well, I can’t use those kinds of words since youngsters might be reading this…my eyes burned, my knee throbbed, I was breathless (and not in a good way!), and my heart was racing so fast I envisioned these trainees rescuing me after having a heart attack out there, in the waves, with Mother Nature laughing in my face.  I finally reach the flat, white rock.  I am so tired, I do not care, I’m going to sit on my board.  OK, maybe not.  The instructor tells me I need to paddle closer to the cliff-whatever, that is about as close as I’m going get, period.  She says, you know, when you’re that far away, you start getting in the channel and it really makes paddling much more challenging and tiring.  OK, fine, I will paddle closer next time.  I’m in the heart of all these trainees, who are at times, a tad clueless, and don’t understand the unspoken rules of surfing.  Like, don’t cut in on someone.  Like don’t paddle across a wave especially if someone if trying to catch it.  Like don’t get so close I can smell what kind of gum you are chewing.  Like get out of the blasted way already!  I’m being sucked out farther and farther.  Better catch something and soon, or I’ll end up down at Mama’s, and I don’t mean someone’s mother’s house, I mean Mama’s Fish House, which is not really that close, in relation to where I am at the moment.   Paddle, paddle, no, don’t paddle, the dang wave will be so strong there will be no need to paddle, and you definitely do not want to go faster.  Must turn and look, don’t care that you are so fearful you might just loose it right then and there.  LOOK!  White-knuckling it all the way baby!  You know the drill, up I go, down I go, no wait, I’m still up.  Hey, I’m riding.  I caught a wave.  I’m surfing Ho’okipa.  Look at me, look at me.  This is so cool, this is beyond cool.  This is rad, this is so totally bitchin’ I can’t even begin to describe it.  There are no words.  Enjoy the moment.  Life in the moment.  Soak it all up, take it all in.  What an absolutely gorgeous view.  What an incredible experience.  The emotions that wash over me are so powerful.  This is why I come back out.  This is why I don’t give up.  This is why I push myself and never give up.  This, this ride, this is why it is all worth it.  Being one with Mother Nature.  Feeling Her gentle breeze in my hair.  Being at the top of world, with no cares.  Finding peace.  Finding tranquility.  What an oh so powerful experience.   You’d think I was riding that wave, for like, an hour, but…yikes.  Pay attention!  The reef, the reef.  Starfish.  You have got to be kidding me.  If the reef didn’t get me last time, it surely will this time if I starfish.  Duh, just lie back down on the board; you do remember how to do that right?!  Duh!  Whew, that was a close one.  Oh my gosh, I SURFED HO’OKIPA!!!!  I ACTUALLY SURFED HO’OKIPA.  YOU KNOW, LIKE, CAUGHT A WAVE AND EVERYTHING.  I SURFED HO’OKIPA!!  OH MY GOSH!  I CAN’T BELIEVE I JUST SURFED HO’OKIPA!!!    I know, I know, get over it.  People surf Ho’okipa every day of the year, it is really not that monumental of an experience, really.  Well, maybe for those pros it’s not, but for me, it was a life-long goal of mine to actually surf Ho’okipa.  Well, maybe not life-long, but since I started surfing anyway. The next half hour was filled with the same kinds of triumphs and tribulations, until it was break time-you know the real reason we were there…to celebrate the trainees making it through the program and all.  I’ll spare you the saga of trying to get out of the water-what drama that was!  Break is over, time to surf again.  Peer pressure bounds all around.  If I just left now, I could still say I surfed Ho’okipa.  I met my goal.  I completed the task.  It’s all good.  “Hey, you coming or what?”  Guess who that was? That’s right, the instructor.  I’ll be right there.  Guess that answers my dilemma. As I reach the, what was that again, what?  Yeah, you know, the flat, white rock, I’m feeling pretty good about myself.  I feel strong.  I feel confident.  I am woman, hear me roar, oh wait, that’s another song.  I swing up on my board, cuz I am going to sit on it if it is the last thing I do, so there.  Whoops, did I forget to tell you, you should never think those things loud enough for Her to hear.  This quaint little spot, by the flat, white rock, doesn’t get the waves, just the little ripples as the wave fades away.  I’m safe in this little spot, by the flat, white rock.  Whoops, I thought that too loudly again, She heard.  Yes, She heard.  I see it.  I see Her.  It’s coming, straight towards me.  It’s rearing up on its hind legs, standing tall, reaching its claws out, stretching to gain that little bit more in height, glaring at me, gaining momentum as it draws closer.  It must be 50 feet high, OK, so I exaggerate, but it feels like it is that high! Instinct takes over, I quickly sprawl on my board, and paddle to IT.  Just as I make it through to the other side, another, and another, and another.  They are coming so fast, there is no time.  I’m getting pulled out, further, and further.  It’s Her or me.  It’s going to be me this time!  I have never turned my board around so fast, ever.  Just in time, as this big, ferocious, beast comes pounding down, on little ol’ me.  Hang tight, just make it through.  Don’t you just love natural instinct?  I do because before I knew what was happening, I was up and riding.  Ye-haw, I’m riding, I caught a wave!!   Mother Nature wasn’t too happy.  Next time, She warned me, next time.  I paddle back out, to guess where?  You got it, the flat, white rock.  I’m going to sit on my board, so there.  Or yeah, I don’t think so, says Mother Nature.  Dang it, can’t a girl just take a rest, or what.  Here they come, again, in the “safe zone.”  One after another, after another.  I paddled through them last time, I can do it this time.  Or, maybe not.  It just knocked me clear off the board, like I wasn’t even holding on or anything.  Under, under I go.  Tossed around like a rag doll.  Grab the board!  There is no way that board is doing a face-plant on me again.  You know kind of hurt.  Look for the bubbles, which way are they going, find the top, hands up.  Ah, air again, I can breath.  Don’t hesitate, don’t wait.  She’ll give you a good push, and boy does She ever.  This time I wipe out.  I go flying through the air, who knows what my board is doing.  Slammed right into the coral on my hinny.  Hey, what’s that throbbing sensation on my foot, no my toe.  Hey, what’s that stinging feeling on my elbow.  OK, there’s blood.  How much?  Is it bad?  Should I get out?  Hum, nothing on my hinny, ok, moving on, can’t quite get to my toe without risking further injury as the waves keep crashing in.  Skip the elbow for now, get on the board, the elbow can wait.  Paddle out of destruction range, closer to the cliff, get to the flat, white rock, sit on board, look at elbow.  Hum, it’s bleeding.  Not too bad.  Cut is small.  Won’t scare.  Good. Deal with it.  Move on.  (Sounds familiar…”is it oozing or spurting?”  Oozing.  “You’re fine”). Mother Nature pushes and pulls me in every direction.  Taking complete control.  Tempting me to cross Her.  Dragging me a little further with each attempt to catch a ride.  One after another, after another, until I am so tired, so drained, I can hardly hold on.  I can hardly paddle enough to catch anything.  I don’t even want to catch a ride, I’m so exhausted.  I just want to get out already.  The instructor invades my thoughts with her announcement that it was time to get out, but I could stay if I wanted.  What, time is up, no way, I’m not even ready to go yet.  Just one more, just one more, please!  I paddle senselessly out, in hopes of catching that last ride.  After several fruitless attempts, I decide to break the surfer’s code, and paddle in.  I know, I know, never, never, ever paddle in, under any circumstances, ever.  But I’m tired, and all the rides I’ve been catching are so tiny and short-lived.  Just this one time, only this one time.  I won’t do it again, I promise.  Ah, but Mother Nature had something else in store for me that day.  She sends thee most gentle, beautiful, rolling wave to me I have ever experienced.  Up I go, riding.  I float across the water, riding the top of the wave, the crest.  Traveling parallel to the shoreline.  Forever.  That whole peaceful, spiritual moment washes over me, as I become one with Mother Nature.  As She lets me enjoy Her spirit and learn of Her joys.  She is amazing, Mother Nature.   I’d love to end the story there.  To make you all believe that the ride lasted forever, but we all know that’s impossible.  But, the ride could not have been more perfect, if I’d planned it myself.  As She died down, I dropped on my board, flipped it around, and paddled to the entry point.  Just to make this story feel like a fairy tale, I had no issues getting out! (wink, wink)  As I carried my board along the shoreline, and up the steps, I thought of Her.  I silently thanked Her.  I praised my triumphant day, but only for a moment, because I know there will be another day.